Justin Timberlake Gossip
Pippy Le Pew is currently starring in a box office bomb. Annihilated by critics and passed over by the public, The Love Guru is expected to drop steeply in just its second weekend. Justin Timberlake, although he refuses to take ownership, is still smarting from the failure. His Shelf Ass meanwhile is also suffering a setback. Full Story
Pippy Le Pew Justin Timberlake claims he suffers from OCD. But of course he does. All artists have compulsions, right? And Pip is, above all things, indisputably an artist. "I have OCD mixed with ADD. You try living with that. It's complicated”, he said. No douchebag… it’s contrived. Full Story
Pipsqueak popped up in Paris yesterday to do a little shopping. Shelfy was not with him in person but, as usual, she was soon present in spirit, as rumours started circulating in America almost immediately that Justin picked up a bauble or two for her. Jessica Biel’s publicist never ceases to amaze. Full Story
Hate being wrong. But love being wrong when it means Mike Myers sucks ass. And Mike Myers sucked very large ass this weekend at the box office. A fourth place finished. FOURTH!!! Not only was he unable to win, he couldn’t even make it close! The Love Guru is a critical and commercial bomb! Get Smart on the other hand – after a couple of clunkers, including last year’s terrible Evan Almighty, Steve Carell finally came back on top. Full Story
Dear Gossips,
If you’ve been visiting this site for a while and familiar with the riddles, this portrait of Mike Myers from Entertainment Weekly shouldn’t surprise you. Perfectionist? Or a pain in the f&cking ass? According to his supporters, his “comic genius” allows him licence to act a douchebag and treat people like sh*t. Problem is, he’s pissed off so many they’re actually pulling for him NOT to succeed.
The Love Guru takes on Get Smart this weekend. It was an unusual move by both studios – rare that two big budget pictures are going head to head on the same weekend. The common practice in recent years has been to move things around to avoid direct confrontation. But neither blinked. Rumour has it that, for Mike at least, it’s become a bit of an ego trip. He wants to take Steve down…
Will Get Smart flop?
Hopefully not.
Here’s Steve with his wife last night at the premiere in LA and please go see Get Smart. Think of it this way – if The Love Guru is a huge hit, we’ll never hear the end of it from Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake who’ll probably start taking credit for saving the film. Not unlike the way he took credit for saving the Grammys.
Tuesday – am online all day. Remember to refresh. NKOTB article is coming… it’s a long one and was distracted yesterday by the US Open. Miss golf. Hate Mischa Barton!
Yours in gossip,
Lainey
PS. Michael Douglas does not have another woman. The other woman isn’t Krista Allen.
Pipsqueak and David Beckham at the Laker Game last night, quite obviously a meeting of the minds. Next to the Golden Balls, Pippy’s undropped handicap is all the more evident. But Becks is hot, isn’t it? As for Justin, didn’t see Shelf Ass Jessica Biel, which would mark the 2nd night in a row she wasn’t allowed to show herself off as his girlfriend. Full Story
The PipWeasel last night on the carpet for the premiere of The Love Guru which – maybe it’s just me – looks like total ass. Even the trailer. Get Smart instead, ok? After all, Steve Carell deserves it more than Mike Myers. And at least Steve isn’t a crazy unfunny bitch on set. Full Story
Dear Gossips,
Justin Timberlake on Leno last night… is SO unattractive when he’s not singing or dancing. Please.Don’t.Talk.
In that respect, Pip is not unlike Becks. But Becks doesn’t bust his balls trying to be cool. Pip is like that boy dressed up in daddy’s suit trying to make his aunties laugh. And while it was endearing when he was 7, at 27 he’s just a Pipsqueak telling bad jokes.
Jay did try to ask him about the Shelf Ass Biel. Pippy tried to be all coy about the engagement question. In the end he denied that they were getting married… but you bet your boob job Shelfy and her agent were hanging off every word, so pleased to have been mentioned on The Tonight show she probably now has it on her audition reel.
Point of the story… Love Guru vs Get Smart next week. Don’t let Get Smart be a flop.
Or maybe I’m just grumpy. Pippy gets to play Torrey Pines and I get to play sh*t. Sigh. Spent the afternoon at the orthopaedic surgeon’s yesterday. The good news – no more sling. The bad news – no golf this season. No hope, no possibility. Nothing. Am sending a thousand virtual farts to f*cking Mischa Barton!
So Madonna is publicly denying she’s hired a divorce lawyer. Do you believe?
Wednesday – am blogging all day.
Yours in gossip,
Lainey
PS. Post Partum Flirtation is not Halle Berry. Hell no.
PPS. This is not about Kate Hudson. Kate Hudson keeps making sh*tty movies. She is not an overreacher. Then again, she’s never worked at a rub’n’tug either.
It hurts me to post these. It hurts to look at my golf clubs collecting dust in the closet. Just before breaking my arm, I had finally figured out my short game. Was supposed to break 100 this season. Many times. F*cking Mischa Barton... Full Story
I reported earlier that Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake’s people were trying to force through a contract obliging journalists covering the Love Guru junket to report only what they approved. Full Story
Seriously … sit your Pip ass DOWN! I call it Small Ball Syndrome. Not unlike Napoleon Syndrome. You know how they say short dudes overcompensate for their vertical challenges by going overboard on toughness and aggression? Well since Pipsqueak’s balls have only partially dropped, it’s like he’s trying to make up for his testicular deficit by swinging a big stick around – a stick wielded not by him but by his legal team. Full Story
Who’s the little Shelfy pouting in the corner? There’s the little Shelfy who needs more attention. Poor little petulant Shelfy has spent weeks off the headlines. That’s why the little Shelfy is stomping her feet. And putting her publicist right back to work. You see, Shelf Ass Jessica Biel has been stuck on a movie set with Jake Gyllenhaal who apparently read her the riot act, telling her in no uncertain terms that she was not to pull her usual paparazzi shenanigans and arrange “candids” from the set of their movie Nailed which has been filming over the last several weeks and recently shut down production reportedly from lack of funding. Full Story
Madonna made him hot…but he’s still a f&cking douchebag. Justin Timberlake has signed with MTV to produce a reality tv show called The Phone, kinda like a Bourne Identity meets the Amazing Race which, to be fair, is not the kind of reality show about twats and losers like The Hills etc but still… This is the same little Pipsqueak who stood up on stage last year at the VMAs and snubbed Lauren Conrad who was presenting his award. Full Story
Attached – Justin Timberlake arriving at the MTV Upfronts this afternoon. Not sure why but it was announced in March that JT is producing an American version of the Peruvian hit show My Problem With Women for NBC. Perhaps the Pip is getting his feet wet. After all, it is tv buying season and we should find out in a matter of days which shows will get picked up, and how the fall and mid season schedules next year are going to shake out. Full Story
Shelf Ass Jessica Biel photographed at the airport headed to NYC after a lengthy delay. Wonder if she’ll be demanding that Pip start flying her in private planes from now on? Because her clever publicist, who has been able to build Shelfy’s career on the sole basis of choreographed candid photos of her impressive posterior, probably didn’t plan this. Full Story
Enough with the comments that she could be his mother. The point is, she could be his mother but she can still match him groove for groove. And she can also kick his ass. As for the griping about the dirty dancing – watch it for yourself. There’s dancing, yes. But it ain’t dirty, no. Full Story
Some important person in Hollywood was married Saturday night and the wedding brought out some young heavy hitters including an Olsen, a Speedman, a Pipqueak, and a Shelf Ass. Here are Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel on their way out of the reception. As you can see from Shelfy’s smug ass expression, someone is very, very, very happy to be greeted by the paps. Full Story
Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake is currently shooting The Open Road in Texas – was photographed trying to hit a baseball the other day. Bet your boob job his Shelf Ass could muscle one into the outfield further than he can. Blame those underdeveloped balls. They help with the high notes, but not on the field. Full Story
She’s 50 in just 4 months but Madonna can still rock it and she still owns it. Warner Music announced today that Madge’s 4 Minutes with Justin Timberlake is the “fastest single to hit #1 in Canadian radio history”. Seriously… who are the dumbasses who keep saying it’s over? It’s not over. Full Story
Justin Timberlake dropped in in lowkey fashion at the Memphis Rock ‘n’ Soul Museum and the Memphis Music Foundation on Thursday donating $100,000 to each organisation in support of local programs encouraging young people in their music studies. Unlike his famewhore of a girlfriend, Pip made his gifts without much fanfare, popping in and out quickly, presumably because he’s been shooting long days and night on his new movie The Open Road. Full Story
